The lizard in the boot!

It is Sunday and where is Will?...at work of course. They are having an afternoon tea drop in and he is sitting under a tree playing his harp while they munch on their veggie burgers. He is not getting paid for it. It is all goodwill just like the hours he spends on their website. It is typical of Will and typical of lots of teachers and teaching assistants I know. So next time you have the misfortune to be in the company of someone bemoaning the education system or ranting about the length and amount of school holidays poke them in the eye, will you? Just say "you know nothing you idiot!"Meanwhile I am pottering about at Celtis St....and going down the back steps, spot a lizard scuttling about at the bottom. It disappears under the steps into the foliage and the shade.I go in and sit in the man cave and fiddle on my laptop. My bare feet resting on astro turf rug. It is not long before I feel ants between my toes and look down to see them scurrying about in the fake grass. I have had enough and find Dulcie's insect spray in the garage...as well as cockroaches,it also deals with ants and I spray under the door where they are getting in  and all around the fake grass rug and go back to my laptop.I hear Dulcie moving about upstairs...she was watching the cricket...I go back upstairs to see if she needs help with tea but she has already peeled the potatoes and there is nothing else for me to do.I head back down the back steps and under the house. Peering at the rug, I don't see any ants but get a shock when the lizard runs out from under the coffee table and slips, skids and slithers across the red painted floor. I give chase and it gets trapped in the corner. I am trying to chase it out but it hunkers down behind some pictures that are waiting to be put up. I move the pictures and it runs along the wall and under the bed. I peer under the bed and see it heading for the other side and leap over the bed trying to head it off before it gets trapped in the opposite corner.I fail. It is trapped again by the great bald headed ogre and cowers in the corner.It makes a dash for a pair of Will's shorts, that he has left lying on the floor rather than walk the few feet to the laundry basket where they would be much tidier, and scuttles up on of the leg holes. I pick the shorts up and gently shake them and it drops out into one of Will's boots. I contemplate leaving it there for when he next puts his boots on...it would be amusing...but decide against it.I grab the boot and squeeze the opening closed and carry it out to the fernery. I tip the boot upside down and gently shake. I see the lizard's tail hanging down but it is still holding on inside for dear life. I shake a bit harder and it drops out and scuttles off with out a hiss of thanks.The great bald headed ogre goes back to the cave and his laptop...he does have some compassion.