'Welcome to the Barr Harmers!"

My day started with the phone ringing. It was Shirley ringing to say that Dulcie had been moved down to a ward on level three. Shirley was worried because they had said when she rang that it was a palliative care ward. I didn’t know what that meant but told Shirley I would go up to the hospital and find out what was going on.I went back downstairs but the phone rang again so dashed back up the steps. The phone went off before I got to it. I had a sudden thought that whoever it was might then try my mobile, which was downstairs, so dashed back down there to get it....but it wasn’t ringing.I went back up and put my mobile on the table and started to wash up....and my mobile started ringing. It was Wendi. She had heard from Shirley. I said I was going to go up and find out what was going on.I quickly finished the washing up and then went down to get ready. The house phone rang again so I dashed back up to answer it. Heaven knows what poor Joanne next door must have thought if she saw me running up and down like a thing demented. It was Danny. He was going to the hospital too. I said I would see him there.I drove over and went to Ward 3b. A nurse looked down a list in front of her and then got on her computer.“She’s in ward 3a bed 19.” She said.I walked to ward 3a and found Dulcie sat in bed. She was fiddling with a straw.“How are you?”“Not too bad, Nick.” She said.She had one of those protein milkshakes by her bed so I took the top off took the straw off her, stuck it in and handed her the drink.“I like the vanilla ones better,” she said, “this is strawberry and it is too sweet.”“Well, drink it down anyway because they make you stronger,” I said.There was a nurse by the door talking to another nurse and when they finished talking I asked her why Dulcie had been moved from rehab.She said she had just been told that a confused patient was being sent down. She said that this ward was a ‘special ward’ and that it had a nurse in it the whole time to keep an eye on the four patients. There were 2 men and Dulcie and another woman. The nurse said that she had not been too bad though and I thought Dulcie seemed much better than yesterday.“Will she be able to go back to rehab when the confusion gets better?” I asked.The nurse did not know. I needed to find someone else to ask but went back to chat with Dulcie for a bit. The nurse pushed Dulcie’s chair a bit nearer for me to sit in.“I had another of the blackout’s last night, Nick,” she said.“What do you mean a ‘blackout’?” I asked.“Well, one of them things where I see things,” she said.“Right.......and what did you see?”“Well, I saw two men by the chair next to me. One was in a dark blue shirt and one was in a light blue shirt. I spoke to them but then I realised I was on my own with them so I pressed my button...and I kept on pressing my button.”It was probably something to do with that that prompted them to bring her down here. I had got the impression from the nurse that she had been down there for most of the night.“Do you fancy a game of cards, Nick?”Yay! I was delighted! This was our girl!We played euchre...one game is the first one to get to 15 but we played just up to whoever got 11 points first.She beat me! I was winning by miles but she steadily crept up and won!“The little children in here are very quiet,” she said. A bit later she pointed to a girl that she could see. There wasn’t one there.In the bed opposite her was a large gentleman in vest and boxer shorts, sat in his chair with his white rimmed sunglasses on. He looked as if he was enjoying a lovely beach holiday. He never moved and looked as if he was staring at us but he might have been asleep under his dark glasses. I looked up at his name on the wall.It said ‘Nikolai Minkov.’ I think he is KGB.In the bed next to Dulcie was Maguerita. She kept walking out of the ward using her walker and after a few moments a nurse would bring her back in. She was fully dressed and looked like a bossy librarian but it turned out she used to be a teacher.She was brought back in while we were playing cards and sat back on her bed but a few moments later I heard;“Excuse me, could you move your chair a little?” She could not get past with her walker. “I am looking for a small grey handbag.”“I think there is a grey handbag on that seat over there.” I said point ing to the bag on the chair on the other side of her bed.“That’s not grey, it is blue!” She shot me down. “I am looking for a set of keys. I need some possessions.” She sat on the bed. “Winter is coming!” she proclaimed. “I need socks!”Dulcie raised her eyebrows and we carried on playing cards.Marguerita wandered out again and was brought back by a little Scottish nurse. The nurse was asking if she had been in management.“No, I was never in management. I was just a teacher. It would have been good if I was in management though. I would have loved spending all night planning what to do next.”It all became clear. Of course anyone who loved work as much as that deserved to be on a special ward.I glanced at Nikolai....he was still staring.Dulcie said she wanted to go to the loo. The nurse was sat on Nikolai’s walker writing in his folder or communist dossier.She put it down and went off to fetch something. Dulcie was already shuffling down the bed.“Just wait until the nurse gets here,” I said. “She’s coming.”I went off to the nurse station to find out more information while she was with the nurse.I spoke to the little Scottish nurse. She said she had been brought down because she was confused and in this ward there was a nurse with them all the time. Danny arrived and she had had a long chat to him on the phone.“Will she be able to go back to rehab once she is no longer confused?” I asked.“I don’t see why not.” She said. I was happy with that.Danny and I went to see Dulcie. She was coming back to her bed.“She’s a bit all over the place,” said the nurse.“Well, she has been in bed for 10 days now,” we said.“Look,” I said to Danny, “she’s not on oxygen,”“Yes, but she needs it,” said the nurse.She handed her the nebuliser.I left her with Danny and brought home some of her nighties to wash.Will and I went back again this evening. Darren had taken over duty in the ward. Dulcie was sat in a chair next to her bed. She was back on oxygen. Nikolai was still in his beach wear with sunglasses on. Terry, the other man on the ward, was sat on his chair and Marguerita was nowhere to be seen.Tea arrived and Dulcie tucked in.A doctor arrived. She said that they were pleased with how things were going. She had been impressed with Dulcie’s answers to questions she had posed earlier about where she was and the day and month etc.  All in all they didn’t think she needed to stay in that ward much longer and were hoping to get her back up to rehab before she lost her bed up there. It was good news. She will perhaps be moved tomorrow.Nikolai had his TV on very loud.Marguerita came back. “Here we are again!” She said.It appeared that she had been out with what I assumed was her daughter. She got on the bed to have the tea that was waiting for her. Her daughter left.“What is your Christian name?” she asked Darren. He told her.She ate her macaroni cheese. A few moments later.....“Evan! Evan!”“It’s Darren,” he said.“I’ve no milk for my tea.”He went and brought her a cup of milk.“Oh you beauty!” she said. “Oh,oh! No butter!”Darren had the patience of a Saint.“It’s there hiding under your spoon.” He said.“Naughty thing,” said Marguerita.We began a game of cards.“Could you switch the wireless off, Nick?” said Dulcie. We explained it was Nikolai’s TV.It was hard to concentrate on the cards with all that was going on around us.Terry wanted to go for a walk but couldn’t because they did not have the staff to cover the ward. He would not let go of his walker.“Don’t touch it!” he said to the nurse who was trying to take it off him.“Why not?” she asked.“The bosses have said it needs to be vented.”Darren had helped Marguerita to the shower.A few moments later the door swung open and she was stood there in just her bra and nothing else...“No soap!” she said.I concentrated on the cards in my hand.Terry started singing.While Marguerita was cleaning her teeth a man and a woman arrived.“Is this your son?” asked one of the nurses assistants.“No, he is far too big to be my son.”I think it was her son. She came out and sat in the chair by her bed. She told them she had been out.“Who with?” They asked.“Monika!” she said. They didn’t seem to know who Monika was. Darren was dragged in and another nurse who said that Marguerita knew Monika and had been allowed to take her out.“We went to the city,” said Marguerita, “and she took me to the bank.”This put the cat among the pigeons. To cut a lot of eavesdropping short....it turns out this chap/ ‘son?’ was trying to get control of Marguerita’s financial affairs. She was in a lot of debt and he was trying to sort it out.“And when I am dead you will keep everything for yourself!” said Marguerita dramatically.It was so difficult to concentrate on the card game.Dulcie won the game....again!Will commented on how nice the curtains were in this ward. When opened they depicted a tropical beach scene.“Yes,” said Dulcie, “The captain of the Brisbane Broncos (football team) brought them this morning!” She was still not quite right but was nowhere near as bad as yesterday.On the toilet door was a whiteboard and someone had written:“Welcome to the Barr Harmers!”She wanted the loo and Darren having just wrestled Nikolai in and out set about helping her.Will and I went out into the corridor to wait.I was staring at the floor. Something moved. It was an ant.“ Can you see that ant?” I asked Will, worried that I was catching ‘Delirium.’He could...in fact there was a whole line of them parading down the corridor.Darren came out of the ward and went into a room opposite.“She’s nearly ready. Should I put her into bed?”We said yes because she was tired.He sighed. “They are keeping me on my toes tonight.”When she was tucked in bed she held both our hands.“Well my darlings,” she said, “ you’d best be off.”We had taken some mince out to defrost for tea but called and got a Chinese on the way home.The first Chinese take away we have had since we arrived in October.We deserved it.