Echo-cardiogram.

Yesterday they changed my echo-cardiogram appointment for 2.45 pm to 9.45 am.I drove to Sunnybank, found the hospital and parked Roxy.The Hospital at Sunnybank is a private hospital. I took the lift up to the second floor and found the Sunnybank Cardiopulmonary Clinic.On pushing the door open I noticed two reception desks, one on my left and one straight ahead. The one on my left had a sign on it with some doctor's double barrelled name. I hesitated...The woman behind the desk on my left saw my hesitation and said "straight ahead," as if I couldn't possibly be a patient arriving to see a doctor with a double barrelled name.I went to the desk straight ahead and handed in my referral form to a woman in a very bad wig.She asked for my name, date of birth and address and of course for my medicare card, then told me to take a seat.This was an upmarket waiting room with cane furniture....there were no "Join the Bowel Movement!" posters here. There was 'modern art' on the wall.There was also a large blind lady with a live bird in a small cat basket.Someone came for her. They helped her up and led her out...."This is Peter 2," she was saying loudly about the bird in the cat basket,"I still miss Peter but the pain gets a bit easier everyday."A well dressed woman came in. She went straight to Doctor Double- Barrelled's reception desk. I was not surprised. After signing in she came and sat near me."Where is the best reading material?" she asked me in a thick Russian accent. I pointed to a pile of 'Gourmet Traveller' magazines on the table between us.She gasped and shrugged in such a way, which I understood to mean, 'What?! With these hips?!'She chose a gardening one and buried herself in it.Finally my name was called and I was lead into a small room.Jenny introduced herself and her Asian student, whose name I forget.Did I mind the student having a little practise on me first? I didn't.I had to remove my t- shirt and lie on my side on a bed.Jenny attached four sticky sensor pads on my chest...Yikes! I was hoping they would come off easier than the ECG ones they put on me at the hospital."Have you had an Echo-cardiogram before?".......No."It will take between 30 and 45 minutes," said Jenny, "Just relax.""Could you hutch your hips nearer the wall?" The student sat behind me right up against my back."This gel might feel a bit cold."She reached over and started moving the ultrasound stick thing around on my chest. I could hear clicking and tapping on computers and Jenny saying..."Just down a bit....there..."...then click.After awhile Jenny took over."Your accent," she said, "whereabouts are you from?""The U.K," I said."Yes, I know that," she said, "But whereabouts?"I wondered what accent I had....I don't think I have much of an accent."Well, I was born near Manchester," I said."You are third person I have seen from Manchester in two days," she said,"What does that say about Manchester?" I said."Exactly!" She said."I have lived most of my life in the Lake District though," I said."Oh, lovely!""Do you know the Lake District?""Yes," she said, I went for a holiday to the U.K and Ireland for a month and we started our trip in the Lake District. We went to Ullswater and we stayed at Patterdale," she said. "We were lucky with the weather."We had a good chat. At one point I heard the sound of my heart coming through some speakers...."Oooh, it sounds just like a disco," I said......It did.....with bass and little cymbal sounds."It just sounds normal," she said.It did take 45 minutes in the end."Have a good day," said Jenny "and good luck finding a job!"I went back out to the reception desk.The woman in the bad wig charged $295 to my credit card. (£170)