A Crude Awakening!

No sooner had Will gone in the back door upstairs this morning than there was a rap on the front door. It was Elaine, the buffalo wrestler (potentially). She'd come to do Dulcie's shower.Dulcie wasn't even up yet nor was I.By the time I got upstairs it was all over. Dulcie was sat at the table all showered and Elaine appeared with an armful of towels from the bathroom..."Ello, luv!""Hello!""Did you watch the election?""We did.""Did ya see me on the telly? I were talking to Annastacia  Palaszczuk. I'm famous now."Actually, I thought, you are more famous than you think!"Do people stop you in the street and ask for your autograph?" I enquired."Not yet," she laughed. I wasn't surprised. I doubt even Attila the Hun wouldn't have approached Elaine if he had bumped into her on the Mongolian plains.We were all laughing then she cut our laughs short with......."My husband passed away.""Oh, sorry," said Will."I'm very sorry to hear that," I said."Yes, on the 27th of Jan. I was driving home from work when I got the call..........we still haven't buried him yet."I couldn't help picturing him hanging under her house like a side of beef and Elaine using him as a punch bag.She didn't seem too upset. Four days after his death she was partying with Annastacia Palaszczuk!"Ey, is it right that, that Julie Bishop is going to replace Tony Abbott? I like 'er at least she 'as more about 'er. That Tony Abbott is a dick head!"It was too early in the morning to discuss politics.She went...."See ya luvee!" She waved to Dulcie."God, she's rough!" Said Dulcie when she was gone.You couldn't argue with that.