'A Little Chaos.'

So........some days never turn out as you expect them to.It was a lovely sunny morning when I woke Dulcie up. I had to raise her because Rhiona was due for respite and Dulcie needed her breakfast and medication before we left.Will and I walked around Forest Lake for just over an hour much to 'Elaine's' chagrin and we got back just before lunch. Dulcie had been teaching Rhiona how to play euchre. She said she did 'OK.'Rhiona said that Dulcie had complained of pains in her chest while we were away.While we were away on out road trip Dulcie developed a pain in her back and was put on painkillers with codeine in them. The tablets helped the pain but have blocked her up.She was not keen for us to ring Dr Hew in fear of being sent to hospital but we rang anyway.He could see us at 2.50 pm.It was all a bit of an ordeal to get to the doctors with Dulcie wincing in pain, but we parked as near to the entrance as we could and Dr Hew, being as good as he is, bumped her up the queue, so she did not have long to wait. A poor African lady who was there waiting before us ended up having to wait longer as Dulcie was called in before her.Will went in with her to make sure Dr Hew got the real story and it was a good job because Dulcie was not very forthcoming with her symptoms.I stayed in the waiting room. There was a magazine for the 'Over 50's' on the table.......right up my street.It was all fancy holidays, gourmet meals and walking clubs but the last 10 pages were all advertisements for Funeral Directors.....I put it down in disgust.Just as we suspected Dr Hew reckoned she was bunged up, said 'no more codeine', just her normal medication and ordered an X-Ray.As we were passing Terry's salubrious establishment on the way home I nipped into see appointment availability. They could fit us in at 4.00 pm. We had 25 minutes to kill so went to the new Zarraffa's coffee shop next door.Dulcie insisted on paying for the drinks and gave Will the money...."and get us something to eat" she said. Will went in to get the drinks and Dulcie rested her head on her arms on the table."This is no life," she said, "I'm just good for nothing.""Give over," I said, "You're paying for our drinks aren't you?....That's good for something.""It's very cloudy," she said. It was....and it had been so lovely this morning.Two enormous ladies squeezed out of their cars."If I was that big I would do something about it!"'Elaine' blew a loud raspberry!"Look at that!" Dulcie went on, rather too loudly."Ssshhh," I said, trying to save our lives from a crushing death.We had to drink up quickly and eat the cake Will had bought. Dulcie wolfed hers down. Will and I shared one piece before we headed back to Terry's.The tiny waiting room was full and there was no seat for me until an old chap was handed his X-Ray films and he tottered off.Terry appeared. He had obviously made an extra special effort to add extra sleaze to his look. He called "James?"......and a big fella with practically a 'van full' of his own 'Elaines' staggered off after him. Only Dulcie, Will and I were left in the waiting room.I read the "About Terry" poster again.Did you know he likes to write and sing his own compositions (Piano and voice)? Imagine 'An Evening of Music and Song with Terry'.......No don't. I quickly stopped imagining it......it was quite awful.Terry's voice boomed out, "Right Chris, Take a long slow breath in, and push it out and hold.........Breathe away."Dulcie raised her eyebrows at me."Ok Chris, I mean James, let's try that again."The door opened and a delivery man came in. The girl at Reception looked up from her internet shopping."Great, could you just pop it down there?"He did and went out but left the sliding door open. I got up and shut it again and returned to my seat.The delivery man came back with two bigger boxes. He had to put them down to open it again. I looked at the magazines on the table quickly.The magazines were tatty and years old....one informed me that Lord Lucan had gone missing......They had obviously been handled by Terry and many other grubby hands. There was a sticker on the front of each;'Dear Customer, Please do not remove these magazines from the waiting room. Please leave them for other customers to enjoy.' The big fella staggered back in and sat next to me.....his hips overflowed his seat and met mine."Mrs Rodgers?"Will and Dulcie followed Terry.The big fella and I sat together in silence with touching hips. I tried not to move but desperately wanted to.Terry was back, with a piece of paper."This is for James, I'll be back with his films in a minute," he said to the Receptionist girl, who was now on Facebook."Who am I now?"..........The big fella had a sense of humour....... "I'll be anybody you want me to be."I laughed nervously and our hips jiggled together."Here you go Jim," said Terry handing the big fella his X-Rays and our hips parted. It was not sweet sorrow. It was relief."Did you find that Peter Hall, or How, or Hew or whatever it is?" Terry asked the receptionist girl. She nodded not taking her eyes off Youtube.We finally made it home. Dulcie had certainly had her exercise for today. Terry said it looked like she was bunged up too and recommended to keep giving the laxatives.It's Tuesday. We were going out to the cinema tonight to see 'A Little Chaos' with Kate Winslet and Alan Rickman. We have decided to stay at home in case Dulcie needs us.Kate was a  bit upset about it but Alan just sneered.